In the blink of an eye…

Life changes, you find yourself in a corner, that’s getting tighter, and you’re moving way to fast.

That’s exactly how I felt last night.

I had a pretty good day at work despite some system and database issues that prevented me from finishing a few items I needed to, I still felt good about my progress as I walked out the door. The ride home was pretty uneventful traffic-wise, which is always a good thing when you have a 50 mile commute!

I had anticipated digging into a project I’ve been trying (and need) to finish for a client, so I could deliver it this week. I also had some good news to discuss with my wife, and a new client to call and set up the first billable meeting with.

All in all I was rolling!

You see, on the ride home I’d called a business associate who’d taken a position with Microsoft about a year ago, and we haven’t talked much since. In the course of talking he informs me that if I’m ever “in the market” he’s pretty sure the folks at Microsoft would like to talk to me!! That might not seem like a lot to those of you not in the industry, but to a guy like me, that’s sort of like a minor league ball player getting a call from the ‘bigs’. Flattering, in and of itself, even if, nothing else ever comes of it

So, I was pretty excited, as you might imagine, as I pulled into the driveway.

One of the first things I wanted to get out of the way was the call to my new client. After a short chat with Maryan, I headed back to the office to do just that. I had to check for an answer from another client before I could make that call though.

One of the first headers to pop up was an email from my sister Kathy.

She’d sent it in the morning; to let everyone know that Mom had been rushed to the Hospital, again, early Monday morning. She’d been in severe respiratory distress along with a number of other problems.

I sat there stunned, I’d talked with Mom on Sunday afternoon. She’d mentioned that she wasn’t feeling well, but, was waiting for Monday to see her doctor as she didn’t want to go to the emergency room.

Fortunately, when I got the number for her room from Kathy a bit later in the evening, and called, she’s feeling much better and this time the doctors seem to actually have a clue on how to treat her.

After I hung up though, I found myself thinking… what would I have done differently, had I known she was this sick? Should I redouble my efforts to find a gig closer to where she lives? Why haven’t I tried to visit more often? As well as a thousand other woulda, coulda, shoulda’s….

In the final analysis, there really isn’t much I could do differently. She’d hate it if she knew I was altering my life, simply because she’s getting older. I wouldn’t be able to do much more for her than Kathy can…. My Mom is definitely her own woman, she’s going to do, what she wants to do, period.

This event did serve to remind me though, that life is too precious and far too short, for us to waste it. That the next phone call you have with someone, could well be the last one. There are no ‘do overs’ folks, we only get one chance to do the right thing for those we care about.

So while I’m relieved today that she’s feeling better, I’ve resolved to talk with Kathy this weekend and find out how to help her feel less ‘alone’ in dealing with these types of issues. She, and our youngest sibling, are the only two of us living nearby, and I know she’s left dealing with most of this on her own. I don’t know exactly how yet, but I’m going to find a way to shoulder some of that responsibility as well.

I’ll find some other things, ways, to help from here as well. When I do, I’ll share them here. One thing I’ve already done is set up a toll free number that Kathy, Mom or Andy can call 24/7 so no one has to worry about the ‘toll’ or finding a pay phone if there’s no ‘cell’ handy.

What would you do?

If you knew, that you, or someone close to you was going to die, and very soon?

Would you change the way you’re dealing with them today? Is there something in your relationship with them you’d “fix”?

Why not do it anyway, even if they’re in perfect health?

Technorati Tags: Relationships - Life - Change