Saturday, July 28, 2007

A week ago I was focused…

On entirely different ‘stuff’.

Last Saturday I was trying to mow the lawn, spread some mulch, trim a little here, a little there. Put away a few of those tools that seem to collect on the work bench… Check in on the Application monitoring at work; make sure nothing’s gone wrong….

Looking into better ways to invest my 401K (paltry as it may be)… getting pissed off that I’ve still got a leak in one of the skylights… why does the dryer ‘smell’ funny when it’s running? Is that a knock in the motor of the truck? When can I get the oil changed in the car?

Those, and probably a thousand other, thoughts filled my mind all last weekend.

Today however, there’s but one thought on my mind. Having Maryan home from the hospital, and making sure she’s comfortable and has everything she needs.

What a difference a week makes ‘eh?

She had her back surgery on Wednesday, while the procedure went well, she was in a ton of pain after surgery. That intense, nothing takes it away pain… They eventually put her on a dilaudid IV pump, late Wednesday night and she was able to at least get some relief.

For those of you who don’t know dilaudid is the next step up from morphine, and the last rung on the painkiller ladder. Even with that, she still didn’t sleep until Thursday night, and then only 10, or 15, minutes at a time.

Now it’s Saturday, the pain is pretty much under control, and she’s home and resting, sleeping actually, as I type.

I want to be pissed off at what this doctor found… I want to call a lawyer, somebody, make someone “pay” for all she’s been put through… but, for the moment, I’m staying focused on doing what I can to help her heal up.

It’s frustrating though, as there isn’t really much I can do… get her a sandwich, something cold to drink, an extra pillow, pick up her prescription… but, other than those few things, not much.

This is one of those things where a person is pretty much on their own… not much they can do either, just ‘cowboy up’ and tough their way through it… one moment at a time.

I’m hoping, that by next Saturday, I can go back to worrying about 300 unimportant things!!

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